If you give a mouse a cookie...

he's going to ask for a glass of milk.

So what happens if you give a mouse some dog food? Our story goes like this:

If you give a mouse some Iams, he's going to shit all over the floor. If you clean up all his shit, he's going to get into your food container and shit all over the food. If he shits all over the food, he will have nothing left and suffocate. If he suffocates, you will undoubtedly find him in the container, dead, and have to clean it up. And, if you scoop him up and throw him in the burn pile with the rest of the garbage, burn him to smithereens, you will go to get your dog some food...and find MORE TURDS THROUGHOUT THE DAMN FOOD. And if you find more turds in the food, you will have to scoop out and throw away the rest of the food by hand, because the air-tight container will be too awkward to pick up. Welcome to my yesterday. Maybe I'll just stick with if you give a mouse a cookie...


Oh, and did I mention that my check engine light has started coming on in the middle of every tank of gas, for no apparent reason? Or that my A/C decided to either work on full blast or not at all? No, I guess not. But Peoria Toyota's service dept. sure was happy to hear about it, fix it, and charge me $737. Ethanol-based carbon build-up was the culprit, ruining 2 separate parts/valves but, hey, keep buying that corn! Actually, Peoria Toyota is so far superior to Fort's Toyota, that I was almost happy to spend that kinda cash, just to not have to deal with those morons in Pekin. Ahh, another blog, another story.